Yankee Brew News Archive

Ask the Beer Doc

Originally Published: 06/97

By: Dr. Connard Brasseur

Hey Doc,

Man, those Red Sox suck. What did you really do during spring training for entertainment?

M. Hall, Portland, ME

Dear M. Hall,

You're absolutely right. Next time, capitalize the word Suck, because they certainly do just that with a capital "S".

As for entertainment, Yvette and I spent some time going to flea markets and doing the things that old farts generally do around here. Let me tell you, that gets boring after a week or so. Every flea market I went to reminded me of Gods waiting room

We did have a good time last month, I convinced Yvette to go to a local carnival, which was good for a howl. Clovis Calverton, a neighbor of ours, went with us too. Clovis retired from the Post Office a few years ago and moved down here. He's got a p

The carnival was pretty lame. They had a lizard boy that looked a lot like Hillary Clinton, and they had this big Seminole Indian guy wrestling alligators. It cost five bucks to get in to that show, so while Yvette paid her five, me and Clovis snuck

His red face had a real strange look on it and his hands were balled up into fists. I tried to grab ahold of him, but he jumped right into the alligator pit and started whacking the Seminole guy. One of the alligators mustve realized what was going

Mike Greenwell sent Clovis a citation for rescuing the alligators, but Yvette is still pissed at me because she can't go to Mega-Seminole Bingo anymore.

Clovis Calverton's Gator Breath Ale

Ayuh, gets a real rise out of Clovis.

Makes 20 homejugs (quarts).

6.6# of Munton & Fison Light Malt extract

(substitute any light bulk extract)

1# English crystal malt

<# Biscuit Malt

=# Caravienne Malt

<# Aromatic Malt

Tsp. Irish Moss

1 ounce Perle hops (60 minutes)

1 ounce Cascade hops (10 minutes)

= ounce Hallertauer hops (steep for 5 minutes)

Instructions:

Steep all grain malts in 2 quarts of water. Try to get the temperature of this mash between 150 - 160 degrees for 15 - 20 minutes. Strain the malt out and add the hot liquor to malt extracts, adding a gallon of hot water to the pot. Dissolve the malt

Avoid local carnivals when drinking this brew.